Five

Five! How can my baby be turning five years old?! Did any other parents out there have a small panic attack with the thought of their child turning five? I think a lot of it has to do with my background in education and child development.  It's been drilled in my head that the first five years of a child's life are super important and lay the foundation upon which their little lives will be built on for the REST OF THEIR LIVES! No pressure or anything! 

Part of me wonders if I've spent the last five years screwing up my kid.  I think I've mentioned more than once that Nathan is basically the definition of the word "strong-willed".  If you look it up in the dictionary his picture will probably be there!  But then again according to my parents my picture would be too-ha! 

Although Nathan's stubborn will can be hard to deal with (ok hard doesn't really cut it but I'm too lazy to look up a better verb to describe his little big personality!) I find myself praying that it will be his stubbornness that leads him to saying no when everyone else is saying yes.  That it will help him stand up for others when no one else will.  And that ultimately it will lead him to be a light for Christ here on Earth when everyone else's light has stopped shining.  

One day Nathan will probably read this blog (who am I kidding? Do any bloggers actually have children as followers?) and if he does I hope he will see and understand how much I love him and how grateful I am to God for bringing him into our lives.  It wasn't what I pictured.  It wasn't what I planned. And if I'm honest it has been one of the hardest jobs I've ever done but I wouldn't trade it for a second.  There have been lots of hard moments.  But there have been just as many moments filled with joy, laughter and love that at times has made my heart want to burst!

Happy Birthday Nathan!