Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Baby Wise

Just by the title of my blog post I know I am probably engaging in a controversial topic...however without baby wise I don't know where my husband and I would be right now as parents.  Probably sitting in the corner crying, exhausted, and overwhelmed.

Baby wise has helped us so much I don't know where to start.  Tiffany was one of the first friends to talk to me about baby wise and I was intrigued right away because of the easy going temperament of her children.  They are a delight to be around and it's not because she just got "lucky", it's because she made choices when they were very young that helped them develop into the kiddos they are today.  And that's not saying that her kids do not scream, throw tantrums or are fussy--I'm sure she would be the first to tell you that's not the truth!

For those of you who aren't familiar with the baby wise method it's basically a way to train your child so they regulate their eating, awake, and sleeping times.  You always do things in that order: eat, wake, sleep.  I have to be honest and say that the first two months with Nathan were rough.  We were doing everything the book said but he did not like sleeping.  He would eventually fall asleep but not without the assistance of Mommy and Daddy and sometimes the swing.  We would finally get him to sleep to only be interrupted by crying 15-20 minutes later.  He also struggled with sleep transitions and would wake up every 45 minutes.  However we pushed onward and I'm so glad we did!

Nathan is now 3 months old....actually almost 4 (the time sure flies by!)  He eats on a regular schedule and naps on a regular schedule.  At night he sleeps anywhere from 7-11 hours.  He goes down without a fuss and stays asleep!  People ask me at work how come I look so rested when I have a new baby at home--it's because I am rested!  People look at my husband like he's crazy when they realize he's still working full time while caring for Nathan during the day.  Without baby wise my husband would not have the time do his job, but because Nathan takes 3 naps during the day (in his crib, not his arms) he is able to juggle things around Nathan's schedule.  

Baby wise also stresses the importance of the marriage relationship.  Parenting is not just about the kids--my husband and I are still married. We still have a relationship to cultivate.  And we still have lives--outside the lives of our child!  Because I take some time for myself, my husband, and other relationships in my life I am able to be a better Mommy to Nate!

I know there are lots of critics of baby wise out there and all I would say is don't knock it until you try it.  Some people think my child should be unattached and neglected  by now due to following the practices of baby wise.  That's not the case at all!  I love every minute I spend with my son and I'm pretty sure he enjoys our time together too.  The reason I'm able to enjoy our time so much is because I get rest during the day and at night--and so does my son!  I personally believe that I'm making choices that are helping my son, not hindering him.  Yes he sleeps a lot--but he's a baby--he's supposed to!  And every time I start to doubt myself I go to wake my son up from his nap or in the morning an am greeted by a huge grin.  To me that's a sign I'm doing something right, not wrong!

If you are pregnant, in the process of adopting a child, or have young children at home go pick up a copy of baby wise today--I promise you won't regret it!  Oh and find a friend who can walk you through it when you don't think it's working.  I'm forever grateful Tiff!

And a little disclaimer that I have to put here or I will never forgive myself.  Baby wise is a book (an awesome book at that) but just because it's awesome doesn't mean you should throw common sense out the window.  I'm a strong believer that Moms and Dads have intuition, or gut feelings, or whatever you want to call it--don't silence those feelings just because the book says something different!

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